Today: October 20 2017
The term "escapism" is derived from the English word Escape - "run away", "avoid", "break". It is an escape from reality, the search for a safe haven, which will hide from unsolved problems and nenalazhennyh relations. Refuge can become anything. Surely at least once, I found a fascinating book, you would sit behind her one day not long. Books, movies and TV shows, hobbies, religion - all these "seekers". But there is another, newly invented by mankind, but for some users being extremely dangerous - is the internet.
WHY CHILDREN "RUN" on the Internet
Teens, especially younger ones, do not fully understand their internal aspirations, their fear and suppress. And if you give vent to desire, we often stumble upon rejection and opposition from others. Not having yet sufficient motivation, self-confidence and patience, they are tired of fighting for "your truth."
The result - a feeling of dissatisfaction with life and no desire to do anything else to take. However, unrealized desires and problems do not go away. Leaves baby. Today, as a rule, it is an escape into the vastness of the Internet. Why? Yes, because this is the path of least resistance. The time spent on the web - it is emotion, pleasure, relaxation and no labor costs and problems. In addition, here everyone can find something for everyone: social networks, games, and hundreds of gigabytes of music and TV series options ... very, very much.
As a rule, run the Internet, children and adolescents who experience a lack of attention from family and lack of communication with peers. This flight to search for like-minded people and support. But it happens and vice versa. Nedolyubili as bad as Perelyub.
Adults, especially women, are prone to excessive interference in the life of a growing child. The desire to get rid of overprotection causes teen to seek a private space in a virtual reality. And, of course, he finds it. The tendency to escapism and depends on the type of character.
It is proved that introverts are more than extraverts are prone to run away from problems and from reality to artificial worlds.
This is not a TOY
Life on the Internet is consistent. And this is the main danger. There is no unwanted contact, no problem and no calls. The child withdraws into the area in which he originally fled, be it a game or a chat in the community of fans of rap music. Information from the outside it has not penetrated. Neither coping or hardening of character - the development slows down.
Another danger - dependence. All "seekers" are addictive, the question - how serious. As a rule, most strongly tied to their online games. In children and adolescents, especially in the age of up to 11 18 years, the nervous system is too unstable and easily influenced. Games also created specifically so as to cause a maximum response and then addiction.
No wonder the whole team of psychologists and specialists working on each game. Their goal - to make sure that the player is constantly getting powerful emotions share preferably positive.
The mechanics of the game is based on a system of bonuses and promotions. He kills the monster - get glasses was level - sounds solemn music. Behind all this are commonplace hormones. We are all dependent on these experiences. Just someone eats chocolates, someone is drinking liquor, and someone goes to his head in the game.
Modern game - a vivid realistic three-dimensional world with detailed objects and characters. Generally, children and adolescents prefer role-playing online games. In them, the player assumes the role of a computer character. This escapism in its purest form.
Playing on the character's face, the child renounces his "I". This virtual "I" eventually becomes a much nicer heart of the child than his reflection in the mirror. Scientists have shown that an unhealthy attachment to the game, and especially to the character, akin to alcoholism and drug addiction.
By the same principle of action of social networks. It would seem, for the account is a real person, and the account is his real name. But social networks can easily do that with difficulty given the reality.
Easily create your perfect, filtering out anything that interferes with the image, and flaunting the fact that among its considered cool.
"THEY important for me"
It would seem that the Internet is no place for a sense of responsibility. Do not get along in the same community, I moved to another. This is not always the case, as sometimes happens exactly the opposite.
Although it is a virtual space, but people "on the other end of the" very real. In online games often have to play as a team. And here, too, there is a place to communicate, trust and responsibility.
The child is forced to rely on other players and feel that they are just counting on him. He feels obliged to be as involved in the game, not to let friends and keep up with them. In online communities of interest is similar.
Gradually teenager more acutely feel the need to always be present in all discussions, to contribute and not to be forgotten, and ejected.
Responsibility, trust. It would be all good. No! Increased attention to online friends and exaggerated sense of responsibility toward them go hand in hand with neglect of their studies, family responsibilities, and communication with loved ones and friends. Escapism begins when the virtual world becomes more important than reality. Here it is necessary to sound the alarm.
A child runs away from the reality on the Internet if:
While at the computer, he experiences the apparent pleasure and even happiness
Remove it from the screen - no easy task. He himself because he never will.
After turning off the computer, the child looks exhausted
He constantly strives to increase the time spent at the monitor
He deteriorated school performance
In the center of interest - just a computer. Hobbies, chat with friends and family moved to the second, if not the tenth plan.
If all you note for their offspring, to take urgent measures. The result of an uncontrolled escape in the virtual world will be a loss of touch with reality, the gap of real relationships. The child will gradually lose the ability to creativity and creativity and become a passive consumer of pleasures. It matures physically, but psychologically remains in an age when the flight began. And the same problems, because he did not learn to deal with them.
Already, psychologists say about the generation of "kidalty" (from the English. Kid-adult) or the adult children. This infantile people who have not learned to live in the present, to find common ground with others, set goals and reach them, overcoming difficulties. History knows very frightening cases of people dying of starvation, being unable to break away from the monitor screen. Among them are children.
So in the year 2005 died Chinese girl, played in World of Warcraft. It is significant that the friends of the game have not abandoned their passions: they held a virtual funeral ceremony.
WHAT TO DO TO AVOID escapism:
1) Do not leave the child alone with the computer physically. If it still does not require you to always close the door to his room and leave him alone, put the computer in a common room, not in the nursery. This will allow you not to step back from the child and constantly, but gently to control it.
2) Do not leave the child alone with the computer psychologically. Criticism of leisure on the Internet and threats to take away the gadget, turn off wi-fi, etc. no good will not result. Children escapism - in fact, the state of the protest, and such actions only strengthen the opposition and estrangement.
You also important to build a dialogue with his son and try to understand his enthusiasm. What he is interested in the Internet, it has to be the theme of your communication. The ideal would be a good time to join the process from time to time, especially if it's a game. This will bring up the younger man to trust you and your opinion. And you will understand what the child is not enough in the real world, and help to create an alternative.
Playing in the "shooter" - means not enough adrenaline, is to write it in the sports section. Sitting in chats with online friends - there is a lack of communication, it is necessary to artificially create "the offline" like-minded group of children from the neighbors or acquaintances.
3) Limit time spent on the Internet. This is the most important rule. A teenager should not hold the screen more than 1-1,5 hours. If it is, of course, not at school. Be flexible: during the holidays or when friends come to the child, the time can be increased. "Iron" should be prohibited not to play before school, homework and bedtime.
4) Suggest an alternative to the job computer. Try to direct the child's interest into practice. Turn his attention to the other computer's capabilities. For example, you can enroll in a training program courses, graphics or design. Let your child learn how to create what he enthusiastically enjoyed every day!
And remember: not any leisure time on the Internet can be considered a cowardly flight from reality. If a child is playing a game, watching a favorite show or communicate in social networks just to relax and get new experiences - it's OK. Worry is when the lives of fictional characters or issues online friends interested him more than their own.
Artificial Intelligence: Children gadzhetozavisimost
According to the nonprofit organization Common Sense Media (US) 39% of children aged up to 2 4 years know how to use the electronic device, including tablets and smartphones. "Gadzhetozavisimost" - an actual problem for today's kids. Bright sign it - loud protests of the child when trying to remove it from your mobile device or laptop.
Side effects - irritability, aggression, insomnia, decreased appetite - parents usually less notice in the bustling rhythm of everyday life. But the manifest "gadzhetozavisimost" can at any age, even in the earliest.
To get to the network
"Why should my classmates spread their offspring packs pictures - resented my friend -. I'm good to the children, we are also planning a child, but children's daily photo reports," VKontakte "- this is madness!" Really, why? That's what we tried to find out.
Unsociable child: what to do when you grow introvert
Some children make friends easily in the sandbox, and others are older prefer to do their own thing apart from the noisy companies. And if the child's sociability and desire to be seen easily encourage and support, then what to do with the baby closed - is not clear. How to educate such a child, that he found himself in this rapid life, without changing its nature?